pages turn (as time advances)

I love Zendikar limited, and am really good at it. I am having a great time at the Magic Pro Tour Qualifiers, but the NJ-area ones are nearly impossible to win; we had almost 300 people at Saturday's PTQ. Basically, this is one of those places where you *have* to be both lucky *and* good to have a chance. So while it's great, it also kind of sucks. But there's three more I can attend, so we'll see if I can pull off both at least once!

Okay, so check it out. We've pretty much hit the wall with condom variations -- ribbed, studded, striped, you name it. So what if we come out with a "Larger-Size Condom." Make all the guys feel like fucking Vikings when they buy them.

But here's the best part -- we make it only marginally larger than regular condoms. That way more regular joes can wear them, and feel like Paul Fucking Bunyan.

Fair point -- our competitors can come up with their own line of "Larger-Size Condoms." But we'll have a head start so we just make our name synonymous with dick hugeness. Call it something like "MAGNUM." And put it in huge, gold writing. Let the WORLD know that the bearer of these condoms has a huge cock. Let's see them buy any other brand.

So in short, a condom that makes the everyman feel like Dirk Diggler. It'll sell like wildfire.

What do you think?

Haha, I found something I wrote like seven or eight years ago, where I took Bush's day-or-two-after 9-11 speech and turned it into a wrestling promo. I still think this thing is funny. And it's kind of eerily accurate in comparison to the original speech. Haha.

Fuck it, I'm still proud of it.

Two questions.

1. I'm roughly level 10 and have maybe 15g to my name. The shops are stocking stuff way more than that, and some Orzamar smuggler wanted me to pay 40g for a quest like I should've had it And I didn't. Thing is, I'm proceeding as normal -- killing mobs, looting chests, picking locks -- so why do I feel like I'm much poorer than I should be?
2. Despite the fact that she's stocked up on arrows, has combat archery, and has all her tactics centered around range and fire, Leiliana insists on switching from her bow to her sword whenever a fight breaks out. What's up with that? I finally got fed up with her and ditched her for Morrigan but I'd really like to keep her in the party. How do I make her suck less?
   

Lazy me. The last few days have included hardly any exercise (does housework count? Why do I feel like I'm always cleaning?), poor diet (I picked up couscous but forget to get fruit, cheese, and bread... sigh), and no writing (stopped right after the 20k mark, so I'm only two days behind, at least). Everyone has a few off days; the guilt over not having adhered to my self disciplines will put me back on the right path, as it has before.

Tweets from the past 24 hours:

• 22:30 I won the Year 4 achievement in Forza Motorsport 3 for 116 trueachievement points #

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SEMANADIEZ Falcons (-1.5) PANTHERS Buccaneers (+10) DOLPHINS Lions (+16.5) VIKINGS Bengals (+7) STEELERS Bills (+7) TITANS Broncos (-3.5) REDSKINS Saints (-14) RAMS Jaguars (+7) JETS Chiefs (+2) RAIDERS Seahawks (+9) CARDINALS Cowboys (-3) PACKERS Eagles (+1.5) CHARGERS Patriots (+3) COLTS Ravens (-10.5) BROWNS

LAST WEEK Tam: (6-6-1) Ryan: (6-6-1) Bob: (5-7-1) Yoj: (5-7-1) Kent: (5-7-1) Joe (4-8-1) Maggie: (4-8-1) OVERALL Joe (72-55-2) Ryan (72-55-2) Yoj (70-57-2) Kento (68-59-2) Bob: (66-61-2) Tam: (64-63-2) Maggie (52-75-2)

God, all the favorites look so good. There's no way all these teams are covering. But it's so hard to pick who will actually fuck it up. I mean, who wants to bet on the Bucs/Lions/Rams/Browns? Nobody! Fuck it, I'm taking ALL the big lines.

Maggie's Picks: Panthers, Dolphins, Vikings, Steelers, Titans, Redskins, Rams, Jets, Raiders, Cardinals, Packers, Chargers, Patriots, Browns
Bob's Picks: Falcons, Dolphins, Vikings, Bengals, Titans, Broncos, Saints, Jaguars, Chiefs, Cardinals, Cowboys, Chargers, Patriots, Ravens

So what the hell is going on back at the ranch that all the LJs are abuzz about?

Tweets from the past 24 hours:

• 01:21 I won the Driver Level 40 achievement in Forza Motorsport 3 for 99 trueachievement points #
• 03:03 I really need to quit staying up til 3 AM rendering and editing Forza 3 videos to post to YouTube, but dammit, it's fun! #
• 09:51 @feartree Pound 0 til the system screams for mercy. Always works for me. #
• 09:52 I have thrown up more this year than I think I have in my entire life. #
• 15:34 New personal best: 65 (Outback) on #flightcontrol - New Level: Cabin Crew, bit.ly/v39CB #

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Ah jesus. I should have known better than that.

http://www.mentalfloss.com/blogs/archives/40324

It's basically a bunch of youtube videos of dogs going crazy with happiness at their owners returning from being deployed in the military. And the last video is soldiers suprising their kids at school who didn't know their dad was back.

My nose is going to be stopped up and my eyes red for like an hour.

Sniff.

Nanowrimo. Hit 20k words last night. Where is this plot going? Who knows.

There are a few write-in events happening in my area, one scheduled to take place just a couple of miles down the street at Cafe Brazil, which I've always wanted to try. I found out last night that nobody showed up to that. Hm. Well, it's not like Nanowrimo is a very group-friendly activity most of the time; if you're all working, you might not notice other people around, and if nobody's working and some people are talking, it's easy to give up on making progress.

I don't have a title for my book yet, and the only reason I am bothered by my lack of title is because I have seen other people's titles in their sigs on the Nano forums.

###

Breakfast every weekday morning: maple syrup oatmeal, wasabi flavored almonds. I've never tried mixing them; I feel an experiment such as that would end in tears.

Breakfast on Sunday mornings is relocating from Norma's Diner (mediocre and not always worth the $20-for-two-people's-meals price tag) to my house. My boyfriend and I made eggs, hash browns, coffee, and apple waffles a couple of weekends ago, and it was awesome. So we've invited a bunch of people over on Sunday for cooking and eating. Firming up plans now to see Boondock Saints II afterwards. I guess enough people petitioned for the movie to come to Dallas.

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As a peon at the office, I'm glad to not have the stressful responsibility of helping out too much with our headquarters branch changing locations in the next two weeks. My department is taking on a little of their workload, and we had a nice meeting about procedure changes yesterday that devolved into discussing soap opera plot.

I've signed up to work a lot of overtime on the 21st and 22nd. I don't know that I'll be working two full 8-hour days, but if I do, I figure having Thanksgiving off followed by one day of work and then a weekend will make up for a really, really long work week. Plus, it would be so awesome to see all that overtime show up on my check the following payday.

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Maggie is dispatching some serious science on the food/fitness/bento blog I contribute to, Fanci Fun Time Blog. Her latest blog post: All About Carbs: How Atkins Diet Is Like a Pirate Ship Only Less Cool. ^_^

Set up another game of Mafia on Forumopolis. This one is even more complicated and intrigue-filled than the Mad Science one was. It takes place around 1930s USSR, and should be filled with all kinds of delicious intrigue. But holy crap, setting it up was a lot of work. It's very rare that I actually wish I was a decent writer, but this was one of those times. Nnnngh. Brain leaking.

...which I had hoped to attend, may very well be the same weekend as the kids' baseball/softball opening weekend.

IOW, sad Templar in snow. :-(

Bioware coder writes free add-on that gives you a storage chest in your camp.

A fucking "Do not launch AoEs if party members will get hit" option in the tactics section.

Rassum frassum rickum rackum Cone of Cold always hitting me and freezing my ass.

It's amazing how something as simple as an actually interesting assignment can turn around your opinion on your job. I'm still not back to being in love with my career or anything, but it took the edge off the crushing malaise of "Jesus, I have another 20 years of doing this crap I am already sick of?" I'd been under the past few weeks.

I know it's curmudgeonly to complain about my job when the unemployment rate is ~10% right now, but going and slogging through a task you can barely stand to be at every day is not that big of an improvement, setting aside the fact that being unable to pay for food and the mortgage is much worse.

Tweets from the past 24 hours:

• 16:14 The amount of money that the Giant Bomb podcast guys waste on video games is sickening. #
• 16:49 3 years after we're married, I finally ordered our hi-res wedding photos on CD. Got a good deal though. 90% off! Was $1000, now $100. #
• 16:49 Being patient pays off. #

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Woman mauled by a chimp shows what's left of her face on Oprah.

http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/33859601/ns/health-more_health_news?GT1=43001

Just look at that pic halfway down the page and try not to be appalled.

When do I meet Zevran? I wanna get my Assassin on already.